new fashions but cliched sentiments

Freshly back from spring break, the girls of the university have deigned to remove their shamefully body-covering winter garb in favor of a more hip, more mod, and most of all more form-fitting style, i.e. the bra-less/wonderbra'd t-shirt. If you've newer seen approx. 2000 20-yr-old women with a fresh tan, spring in their step, and a bounce in their chest--well, you should. If jebus existed, he would have said It Is Good.

What's the deal with not having body hair, though--and doesn't anybody like pheromones? Well, hell, of course you train your kids to like a sanitary odor-free environment. Because not-smelling-like-anythingness is next to jebuslyness. Except if you smell like $150/oz. Then it's okay. Anyone who's dated an athlete knows a good clean sweat when they smell one--it's delish. No, I'm not pushing that underarm-licking thing (The Joy of Sex? more like gross me out pervs). But think about this: a woman starts to smell when she's hot--and if you're not attracted to it, maybe that's cause you're some kinda wacko-Xian or other repressed soul caught in the 17th Cen. of like sexual carefreeness. (Ain't pushing Free Love 'cause that's a crock, so leave it to the bonobo monkeys.) Body hair is good for holding in a person's scent, and also it's real sensitive if you know how to almost-caress someone. I mean, damn, you and the dolphins--who hump a helluva lot but don't grope--and the naked mole rats are like the mammals with no body hair--superior... or inferior? (Hint: you=losers.)

As the man says, "Smell you (and your burning shame about yourselves) later."