Skort?

So I see this chick with a round ass that's definitely worth a second, third, and forth look. But she's wearing this...thing. Like a short skirt but there's something between the legs, and big letters printed on the back. You know like those things you women wear to call attention to their asses. That clothing item, though, is--as they say--F-U-G-L-Y. It's not nearly as enticing as this. What the hell ever happened to hot pants?

Bring back hot pants!

And while we're at it, this too.